Stop to Smell the Flowers

I visited my dad this weekend and upon getting off my car, I got a whiff of something familiar in the air. At first, I couldn't pinpoint what the scent was but when I looked down the street, I saw the source of the aroma. It was the 'frijolio' tree.

To be honest, I really dunno what the tree's real name is and I didn't have much time to research it before posting this entry. Frankly, I haven't had much of a chance to write, much less google anything BUT I wanted to share this before the flowers withered away to little pods that look like beans. I guess that has something to do with the name (Dad calls it that).

Anyways, the scent of this flower automatically reminds me of home. My brother even took a bunch and used it as an air freshener for his car. 

BTW, it's been a hectic month for me. I apologize (again) for the sparse blogging. It's gotten to the point where I don't even remember what I had for dinner the night before. It really is that bad. Want proof? 

This past Friday, I arrived to my apartment. Since it was raining, I carried my daughter inside, in order to avoid her leaving a trail of mud in the living room. Well, when I put her down on the couch, I took off my shoes and closed the door. We went about our normal evening routine until I heard a knock on the door. This startled us, considering we don't have many visitors, and when I checked the peephole, I didn't recognize the woman standing on the other side. I opened the door to see what she wanted and that's when I realized exactly why she was knocking....I HAD LEFT MY CAR DOOR OPEN!! The woman was my upstairs neighbor (goes to show how often I'm at my apt) and she was concerned upon seeing that my car door was open. I profusely thanked her, closed the car door, and went back into my apt, shaking my head in disbelief. I swear I'm not usually so spacey. 

So, yes ladies and gentlemen, it's been one of those months. But it'll get better soon. I hope so.

Till then, take a second to smell the flowers. It helps. 

Sometimes It Hurts

*wrote this a couple of months ago and didn't have the nerve to post it...the storm's passed...I'm better now*

I wanna confess something to you all. It's not easy for me to do this, and it's probably not going to be pretty (que dramatic, no). I've met the guy I wanna marry. I've had him in my life for a while. You know what's the saddest part of this story of mine? He'll never actually be my husband. Curious as to why? I'm the token good friend. (Insert the sad face emoticon here)

It's like a flashback from my high school years. I always fell in love (well what I thought was love) with my best guy friend and I'd always end up having my heart broken because they didn't feel the same way. I was only ever to be the friend. Their confidant, their best pal, just one of the guys...I never really ended up dating any of them. And please don't think I feel in love with all my guy friends, there's only two that really stand out that I ever had strong feelings for. Boyfriends? I only had one. That story's been told over and over...and we all know how that turned out.

I didn't expect to fall  any time soon. Well, it's been two years since my split from my daughter's father, so it's not that soon. What makes this guy so darn special? I have an image of what my ideal guy would be like, this guy fits the bill perfectly. I'm not even exaggerating.

But we can't forget that he'll never really be with me. What do I learn from these situations? I really dunno. It seems to continue to happen to me, so I guess I haven't learned anything. Does it suck? Of course! Am I going to shrivel up and die because of it? Nah. It'll sting for a while but eventually he'll fade away into a memory and one day I'll think about him with fondness...and not with the sadness I feel now.

It's the way of the world. I can continue on and on with my sob story but what's the point. But this guy is special. But I guess he's just not for me.

And here goes the token sad love song. :(